THE MARVELOUS TAMANG ETIQUETTE (MANNERS)

Tamang people are excellent hosts and are considered as big heart people, which may be by virtue of their compassionate nature. Most of them are accessible and approachable, and are governed by frequent interaction with each other. They visit the houses of kith and kin, and the visitors do drop in to their houses quite often. The visitors are always accompanied by one of the members of the host family to attend them. Traditionally, Tamang people love to offer food and drink to the visitors and they do not feel good if anyone leaves their houses without eating or drinking. Even if somebody casually drops by their houses especially when they are neighbors who see each other daily, it is considered to be a social visit. In all the social visits, food and drink is commonly offered. The urban Tamangs begin their hospitality by offering water or cold drinks or juices which is followed by tea/coffee & snacks, drink especially during the night and food at last. The drink is served during the day time exceptionally, as the use of alcohol by urban Tamang households has diminished. The dining is mainly conducted in three different ways- the ground serve, the table serve and a buffet system. The buffet system is gaining popularity not only in urban Tamang household but also in rural households. It is a system of serving meals in which food is placed in a public area where the diners generally serve themselves. They can directly view the food and immediately select which dishes they wish to consume, and usually one can also decide how much food they can take. Buffets are effective for serving large numbers of people at once, and are often applied in large social events or large parties. In recent times, buffet meals are increasingly becoming popular in Tamang family dinner parties, especially at homes where limited space complicates the serving of individual table places. It involves eating in standing postures which is considered to be un-healthy, indiscipline and unnatural in terms of cultural ethos. It is also considered to be an informal form of dining as a buffet involves diners serving themselves. In Tamang community, sitting with a crossed leg and eating together with all the family members is a traditional way of doing so considered disciplined and the healthiest posture. Despite the above fact, table serve is the common prevailing system of dining in urban Tamang households. In rural areas, the hospitality begins with normal water or tea followed by ji, which is a fermented millet beer (local brew). Ji is preferably served in a drinking bronze bowl. It is served by whisking water with the beer mash and without straining away the mash so that it serves the purpose of filling the appetite as well as refreshing. The drink is to be served cold in the summer, heated in winter accompanied by some kind of khu-a spicy snack of beans, popcorn, vegetables or meat. Tea is an alternate means of drink. However, the leaves, spices, and sugar needed to make tea may not be available or cost effective to everyone. At times, salt tea is also served as an alternate. Most commonly, home-brewed ji is served to those who drink and hot fresh milk or cooled butter milk to those who do not. These set of rules or customs is the accepted behavior in Tamang community and constitute the customary codes. The Proper etiquette in Tamang means offering at least one refill or repeat of drink followed by second serving of the snack. People who do not want to drink or eat much leave their bowls untouched until the refill or repeat round has been completed so that they can end up drinking & eating together and also leave the dining space together. Leaving the dining space in between eating & drinking is considered in-discipline and even if someone does, it is done with the permission from the group. As far as drunkness is concerned, except the old groups, it is rare and almost exclusively the domain of young men on festival days as one bowl or two accompanied by a spicy snack may be a great starter to easy conversation, relaxation and companionship to Tamang youngsters. Submitted for readers’ opinion.

TEACF, INDIA